Pity party for one please??

I'm tired, I'm overwhelmed & I don't know how I am going to make it.

How do people do it, this 2 job, 7 days a week bullshit, how do they manage it?

My house is a fucking wreck, not that that is any different than before but now I truly do not have the time to clean it. We aren't eating good at all because I don't have the time to cook a damn thing. I need to go grocery shopping but I don't have the time.

My schedule right now:

Saturday, we got up early & went clothes shopping for the kids, they needed some warm clothes with winter officially starting, came home just in time to shove food in my mouth & change, then off to work from 3 to 12.

Sunday, basically the same except I slept just a little later, like 10 or 10:30 I think, off to Target, home in time to eat lunch but Kid was here to pack my food for me, then off to work from 3 to 12, was supposed to be 11 but 2 cashiers called off & Cheryl didn't want to stay alone & I wouldn't leave her alone, that's not very nice, LOL.

I cannot remember when my last day off was, I think it was last Saturday or maybe it was last Monday.

Anyway, I didn't get home until nearly 12:30 last night, had to do a load of laundry all because I told Kid not to do it, why would I do that, uggghhh?? So I was climbing into bed at 1:30. When I woke up at 7, I literally felt like I had just closed my eyes.

I went to work at the cleaners. All I could think about was coming home to take a nap before I went grocery shopping. Then she came back & asked if I could work late & I said yes, like a dumbass. At one point I almost cried because I was feeling so sorry for myself, lame, I know. I do all of this for what?? Well, then I started thinking okay, how late is late, maybe only 1, that is not so bad. But then she came over at 12 & asked if I could work until 2 & I said yes but I had to eat. After lunch she then came over & asked if I could work until 3.

There went my whole afternoon, no time for a nap, no time to grocery shop, as I had to pick up all the kids at a little after 4. So I went to Walmart to exchange a shirt that I bought Zach & return a bunch of jeans the girls didn't want.

What do I do when I get depressed....... eat & shop. The 2 things that are killing me. I bought a new toaster oven & a new teapot.

Ok, back, had to leave for a bit, take the girls for new sneakers & go to Walmart for some food stuff, a small grocery, for the week.

I was talking to Kid about all this & I nearly cried because I was thinking about all this shit, all this working & between all this, I have no time at all for myself. No time to do something I really want to do.

I am just really tired & really depressed, it's also that time of the month already & that is totally fucking with my head.

Okay, a funny little story & then I am off to take a hot bath & hopefully get my feet & shoulders rubbed, I am aching all over tonight.

So, this old guy, he stocks at night, well, he isn't old, I think he is 43, he was talking to me while I was on lunch last night. He was telling me about how he works 3 jobs but what he really wants is to get his business going. I asked what kind of business it was & he said he sold stuff, like watches, sunglasses, clothes...... lingerie. He then shows me this paper with the lingerie on it, this is not your classy Victoria Secret lingerie, this is like nipple-less bras (with the chic sqeezing her nipples, thank you) & black leather looking stuff, really sleazy stuff, LOL. I was like, OMG, I am looking at this in the freaking break room at Walmart, I was nearly blushing, LOL.

Well, then he hands me this fat, like 1 inch thick catalog & all I could think was oh boy, what could this be, LOL. Imagine my surprise when I opened it to discover TOYS!!!!! I was blushing over the lingerie, imagine what I was thinking now!! Needless to say, I wasn't very comfortable looking through it in the break room, what if Pat had walked through or something, LOL.

Well, I guess I am done. Kid worked today, so he is oh sooooo tired & wants to go to bed, leaving me to work on laundry & put away the food from dinner. I think I'll eat a chocolate bar first. He won't rub my shoulders until I take a shower & I am far from being ready for a shower yet, so I guess he'll be asleep.

Yea, it is time for that candy bar *sigh* . Don't mind me, I'm just feeling sorry for myself like a big fat loser.

Oh, by the way, in the next 3 days, I will only see my kids for 15 to 20 minutes in the morning :( . And for about 2 hours on Thurs. My schedule will be 8 to 12 at the cleaners & 3 to 12, possibly 11 at Walmart for the next 2 nights & 8 to 1, 2, or maybe even 3 at the cleaners on Thurs, then 7 to 12 at Walmart. That makes me sad.